I have lost myself

It is sad. Really crazy sad even. I didn't lose my mind but I lost myself! I just read through my blog and realized that the ME is gone, like it went missing somewhere on the way to now! Where am I?

As time goes by - an update

 

Mesut will be 15 months after some days. We spend the summer in my mother in laws summer house and are now back in the city.

Mesut started walking at around 14 month and hasn't stopped since hehe.

I got a new phone and found out how to blog on it.

I hope I'll come back here soon and often !

Peace

My husband told me that i am a gentle mom.
Thats probably the biggest compliment he could have given me as a mother.
I want my son to remember his childhood with me full of peace and gentleness. Full of guidance and support. I want my husband to find peace with my. But to be able to nourish my both boys the way i want, to give them the love and peace i wish for them, i need to find peace in me, peace in my life. I need to nurture my self to create a surplus of peace in me so that i can be able to give and share with my loved ones. Peace and contentment is what my heart is asking for.
May Allah pour his peace over my heart and let me find rest in myself.
May Allah let me allow myself to be content, to be rested, to be happy. I want to fill my days with the things that increase my peace and empty them of anything that tries to take that peace from me.
Ya Allah please let me be successful in my quest of peace, contentment, satisfaction and ultimately happiness so that i can be the best mother for my son and the best wife for my husband by being my best self. Ameen.

Flylady Babysteps Day 1

Day 1 – Shine Your Sink

After you do this, you will keep it shiny by drying it out after each time you use it and making sure when you go to bed that it is shining so it will make you smile in the morning. This is how I get to hug you each day! That shiny sink is a reflection of the love that you have for yourself.
Our FlyLady system is all about establishing little habits that string together into simple routines to help your day run on automatic pilot. You can do this!
Not sure how to shine your sink? Read FlyLady’s FLYing Lesson on how to shine your sink.

Flylady - Babysteps

Dear Precious New Member,
I know that you have become overwhelmed by your home and the chaos that you have been living in. We are here to help you, and it doesn’t cost you a dime. Keep in mind that your home did not get this way overnight, and it is not going to get clean in a day. We are going to teach you how to take BabySteps and establish little routines for getting rid of your clutter and maintaining your home. This system will work for anyone; it doesn’t matter if you work outside of your home, stay home with children, are retired, or work at home. You can do this; you have just need someone to pat you on the back and give you a great big hug to get you started.
The voices that you hear in your head keep telling you that you are behind and you have to get it all done now. We are going to quiet those negative voices that are beating you up constantly and replace them with a loving, gentle voice that tells you that you are not behind and you can do this one BabyStep at a time!
Please do not get impatient with the process. Everything we do is going to help you replace those voices that put you down. We are here to lift you up and celebrate every little accomplishment.
Your very first BabyStep is to go shine your sink. Don’t listen to those voices that tell you that it not going to help your messy house. This is exactly where I started, and this little habit has changed my life! Take this BabyStep in faith and go do it. Here are the directions for shining your kitchen sink.

The right to be listened...

Listen to your mother!
I guess everybody knows that rule.

But what about listen to (and apply) what a mother decides for her child?
Have you heard about that rule too?

My friend who is working in child-care once told me, that one of the mothers she works for requested her to not train her child how to walk and rather carry it until it starts to walk on its own.

Can you imagine what would happen if my friend wouldn't respect that wish of hers and train the kid to walk, even the mother requested strongly not to do so?

When a religious leader gives out a Fatwa, he has the right to be listened and his fatwa needs to be applied. He takes the full responsibility and therefor must be followed, even if he's wrong.
A mother is her child's leader. She has the full responsibility on his upbringing and his education and therefor should have the right that her decisions, regarding her child, are respected.

How will a child learn, that his mothers decisions need to be respected, if people around don't care about those decisions?

Ya Allah,
let me fullfill my responsibility as a mother and guide and educate my child,
make the people who suround me respect me as a mother and apply my decisions regarding my child.
And let me go the right way and make the right decisions always.
Ameen.

I am back in my jeans...

MAVI Sophie straight-leg mid-rise 27/30,
welcome back in my live and on my legs,
I have missed you a lot during the past months!