I am so sensitive to outside influences and opinions that what ever mood I am surrounded with, it will pass to me too.
Like if I am surrounded by someone complainy, pessimistic I'll directly feel bad and depressed too.
And I immediately feel that it's my responsibility to change the persons bad mood and to make him/her happy again, which sure I cannot and even if I could wouldn't be my responsibility but rather that particular persons responsibility itself.
While I am aware of this since quite sometime and try to be mindful about such situations I just realized something else influencing me and my perception of my life.
People are acting like they pity me, feel sorry for me for having such a hard live, sorry for me for having to care for my in-laws, sorry for me for having so much to do in my household, sorry for me for having to stay up until 2 am to get the dishes done...
The list is endless...
This feeling of being sorry for me convinced me that really, I am someone to feel sorry for, I am someone living a live others should be sorry for...
While actually, my life isn't that bad!!!!
I have had the pleasure to find, marry and live with the love of my life,
I have two wonderful, healthy, happy babies,
I live with my in-laws who love me to death and don't stop praising me,
I can take my babies to the park and have picnic every single day,
My family is healthy, we have no major financial problems, we don't fight...
Does that sound like a life I should be sad about?
And still people keep pitying me, keep feeling sorry for me...
Why?
Don't make me feel bad, don't make me feel sad just because I might not live a life you think is a satisfying one.
Please just stop making me feel sorry for myself by being sorry for me and my life.
My life isn't that bad, my life is pretty cool!
